Where The Wild Things Blog

I'm SO not a blogger!!!!

2011-06-28T09:24:00.001-05:00

Last week I had a few sweet messages from friends that they loved reading my "blog." As I began thinking about it I realized that I really don't have a "blog." I am feeling a little guilty that I even call it that:/ I know so many other people that make daily or weekly entries to their blogs and I write just whenever I feel there is something I need to say OR when I have the time to do it. I believe my "blog" is more of a journal or at least that is how I see it. A journal of my life and our families life, experiences that we have concerning Asperger's and thoughts that I may be experiencing at the moment. So goes today....many thoughts about our life journey right now and of course Summer break:)

Summer break is always an interesting time in our family. Mainly because my boys are ALL together at once under the SAME roof;) I love my boys but the fighting during the Summer is A LOT and after a while it does begin to get on my last nerve. I really do try to keep them busy but sometimes I'm tired from all of the going and just need a break! I know one day I will miss our Summers and the loud voices....or maybe not;) How many more days until school starts? Ha!

Here are a few things that have happened since school was let out: Lots of tears leaving Joshua's school...TIS...Saying goodbye is never easy for me especially when the people mean so much and have given far and beyond anything I could have ever imagined, Will turned 9, Cliff and I celebrated another year of marriage, VBS-- where I dressed up as a different Star Wars character each day, Zach received a buzz cut after playing "haircut store" with a neighbor, I had another birthday, my wonderful friends threw me a surprise party with my favorite Mexican cuisine,I survived a sleepover with 2 of Will's friends,I managed to have a "getaway night" with my hubby thanks to Mom, I've put myself in the battle zone many days with the boys, we've enjoyed swimming at the Y, I'm trying to come up with solutions for Josh's aggressive meltdowns, weekly trips to the LEGO store, countless minutes of cleaning up messes made by all...Whew! No wonder I am tired!!!

Of course Summer is not over and we have many more days ahead for more adventures! If I do not write a "journal entry" again until after Summer I hope you all have a great one!!! Lots of love to you:)

Thoughts read at my Grandmother's Funeral...

2011-05-04T08:40:00.001-05:00

1 Corinthians 13:1-13
"If I speak in the tongues of men and angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies,they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain:faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

I chose this beautiful scripture because it summed up Grandmother Polly's life to me. She was all about love and she was not shy about using the words "I love you." As I glanced through a scrapbook album, consisting of pictures of Grandmother and people she loved, there were many inscriptions like "We love you", "love always", "Yours only" and "Yours always".....you can almost sense the love just by looking at her handwriting. It oozes from the picture and makes you feel good. That's how our little Grandmother was...she was loving and good.

After Grandmother was diagnosed with cancer several months ago, floods of memories came to my mind. Many years worth of memories! I thought I would touch on a few that always make me smile:
1. Chef salads at Kings Inn Restaurant after church on Sundays.
2. Beef tips at the Sizzler with sauteed onions and peppers.
3. Beets and blue cheese dressing. Corn flakes with milk and banana.
4. Long walks through the woods on a Saturday night. For a long time I thought Grandmother was an Indian because she knew the name of EVERY tree,EVERY plant and EVERY flower.
5. Frozen coconut she always kept in her freezer, my first experience dipping bananas in chocolate and freezing them and homemade wine that burned your throat when it went down!
6. The story she always told of the gopher rat that was behind her door at home. She took a bat and hit it! Then she would make the noise "eee" "eee!" I still cant believe how brave she was and the thought of the whole thing makes me even chuckle now!
7. Our family trips to Gatlinberg where she always wanted hot caramel popcorn and a new bell.Trips to Panama City where we made her "cruise" with us down the strip. We didn't care....we still looked at boys even with her in the back seat and Dad driving!
8. The infamous trip to Six Flags where we all rode The Scream Machine roller coaster and her glasses came off and she slid all the way down in her seat! All while holding on to her purse of course! The conversation afterward when Joanna said, "Grandmother next time you can leave your purse with those people." And Grandmother responded "honey,there wont be a next time." So funny!
9. The beautiful parakeets she always had in our home...of course they were all named Pete. She would call whichever Pete it was at the time and I can still hear her say "Pete's a pretty bird." "Pete's a pretty bird."
10. Me, Joanna and Grandmother all three in her bed watching Love Boat and Fantasy Island on Saturday nights. Those shows were not allowed at our home but being the "fun Grandmother" that she was, it was allowed:)
11. Long visits and encouraging words. She always knew what to say and always had a listening ear for me.
12. Biscuits and homemade blackberry jelly. Of course, the little crispy hoecakes that she would make for both me and Joanna. Colorful plates, cups and saucers all used for our pretend restaurant. She didn't mind our mess...she encouraged it:)
13. Songs like Zacchaeus and I'm A Little Teapot
14. The hard worker that she was and the sweat that would drip from her brow.
15. Vanilla ice-cream and hot coffee....together!!!
16. Story telling while babysitting. She would lie at the bottom of Joanna's bed with her arm across her eyes. Every time she would try to sneak away we would say, "Grandmother, where are you going?" And of course she would resume her position and wait till we fell asleep.
17. Her laugh and how she would cry when Dad would get her tickled.
18. Her famous words..."I'm just fine!"
19. Her never ending love for her husband Vernon and the strength that she showed for 36 years as his widow.
20. Her constant use of three simple words..."I love you."

What wonderful memories....so many more that its hard to recall ....but they are there ...in my heart and mind forever.

Before I end I would like to talk a minute about the beautiful love story between my Granddaddy Vernon and Grandmother Polly. I was only around 4 years of their marriage before the Lord called him home. I do not remember a lot about that time but I do know how she lived her life after he was gone. Grandmother had such a true and real love for Granddaddy. She loved talking about him and recalling memories. I guess that's why it never really felt like he was gone. I'm sure Grandmother had her moments, and I'm sure there were many moments she cried out with hurt and pain, but in front of us she was strong, she was courageous, she handled whatever life on this earth dealt her. And she did it all with grace and an attitude that it was ok...."what will be will be."

I knew Grandmother's time was coming to a close and I am so thankful for the wonderful last visit Joanna and I had with her. She was very alert and we made her laugh...a lot! Of course it was not easy at that point and she would start choking. She never ceased to tell us how much she loved us and really seemed like that was all she wanted us to know...that and "she was fine." I loved watching her with Dad and seeing the amazing love in her eyes for him. I bet she told him and Rita those words 1,000 times before she passed away.

I do have tears for Grandmom...I will miss her but mainly my tears are joy. Joy that she is not hurting anymore, joy that her body is healed and renewed, joy that she has been reunited with countless family members and friends, joy that she was a believer in Jesus Christ and she is with him now and endless joy that she is with Granddaddy. The "romantic" part of me believes that he was standing by Jesus when she arrived in Heaven. He said something like..."Wow! What took you so long?" She said, "Look how handsome you are! You were always so handsome!" They then embraced and Granddad gave her a BIG ole kiss:) They are together now for eternity and I know she sees us today and wants to leave us with these words...."I love you and I'm just fine!"

Isaiah 40:31--"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary., they will walk and not be faint."

The Lord's Supper and Indiana Jones? Who Knew!

2011-04-25T12:57:00.000-05:00

Our Church, Valleydale, had a really unique opportunity for the community this past Thursday and Friday. Easter is so often just celebrated on Sunday but thankfully we had many reminders throughout the week to prepare our hearts and minds for that special day. One of the opportunities was called "Passion Week Experience." It's hard to even describe how awesome this was...very moving and enlightening. There were different stations that focused on the last words of Christ...while he was on the cross. We were provided with a beautiful pamphlet that had meditations to read, a tv with selected scenes from The Passion movie and even interactive things to participate in. I really did not know if I would be able to go, much less the Sons of Thunder, but thankfully I did.

My Mom was in town to help out with Joshua's belated birthday. Perfect timing to leave Zachary with her and take the "big boys";) Well, Will was not in the best mind frame to go so Josh and I went together. I explained to him that some of the scenes we could see were graphic and we had to be VERY quiet...he could not talk to anyone about the 80's or LEGOS. We MUST focus on God and his son Jesus. Josh and I walked into the quiet and began our passion experience. It was amazing how Joshua was focused on Christ and listened to every word I said pertaining to the exhibit. We came to the part where we were to pick a stone and pray for someone who was hurting and in need of salvation. Josh picked up his stone and immediately began praying for the children of Iraq and Afghanistan that are living in the war torn environment. He began to pray so quickly I barely had time to close my eyes:) He prayed that God would protect them and keep them safe. He also prayed that someday he could go there and tell the children about God....it was precious. Another "heart smile" moment:)

We went through the entire exhibit with no mention of an 80's song or LEGOS. Very peaceful! At the very end we came to the Lord's Supper. We walked into the area and a table was set low to the ground with pillows to sit on. The table was set with large goblets and plates. We read where we were to imagine which apostle might have sat where we were sitting...where Jesus might have been sitting,etc. Joshua and I prayed together and took the Lord's Supper together. It was a great moment. As we got up to leave Joshua grabbed the goblet next to him and stood up. He began rocking back and forth when a funny look on his face like "whoa it's the big one!" "Did you feel that?" Josh asked. "No, what is it?" I said. "It's just like in Indiana Jones and the Temple Of Doom when the earthquake comes!" At that moment I knew it was time for us to leave. Especially since a man had just walked in to have his quiet time and saw Joshua rocking like a mad man:/ As we walked hand in hand I said, "I never thought Indiana Jones would have had anything to do with the Lord's Supper". Joshua just smiled his big grin.

I'm so thankful that Jesus came into the world to save us from our sins. I'm so thankful for opportunities like this one with my son. I'm so thankful for my Aspie child and how different he sees the world. I truly learn something new every day:)

Light It Up Blue!!!

2011-04-17T17:33:00.002-05:00

This month is National Autism Awareness Month! I was going to write about my son Joshua and how Autism has affected our lives but after this morning I decided to write about someone else. Someone who lives with Autism everyday and has grown stronger because of it.

I met Sarah Cook several years ago when my friend Kim Spangler and I decided to start a support group for parents of special needs children. Sarah came into our meeting and I was blown away by her outward beauty. Of course, as the weeks went by, I came to know her inward beauty as well. Sarah's son Max was diagnosed with Autism at a very early age. He also had deafness and was receiving implants during the time of our first gatherings. She seemed a little nervous/anxious during that time but also seemed to be SO proactive. Max had already been involved in multiple therapies and had weekly trips to the Chiropractor. Sarah was just plain "on top of things!"

Years have passed and later this week Max is going to be 8 years old! I got to visit with Sarah and Max this morning at church. I was sitting in the church lobby listening to the guest speaker with Josh and Will. Sarah and Max came out of the worship center because Max was getting a little upset. They came over and shared a table with me. I'm so thankful to have a buddy who totally gets "those situations" and more;) As I watched Max with Sarah I couldn't help but smile. Boy does he LOVE his MaMa!!! He loves to touch her skin and nuzzle his face to hers. He loves to kiss her... SO precious!! I watched Sarah as she smiled and laughed at Max loving everything about him...just the way he is. It's more than a beautiful sight. I cant even type the right words that would sum up my thoughts on this precious display of affection. It is the love between a Mother and her child. A child that is nonverbal but expresses his love and affection very well. A child who uses his eyes and smile to "light up" a room and tell you exactly how he feels. Sometimes the eyes just say it all!

Thank-you Sarah for being such an example to me of devotion to God and family. You have always inspired me and humbled me by your service and dedication to church and not letting anything get in your way! Thank-you for being an ear when I'm stressed and always offering wisdom in the situation. Thank-you for using your words to encourage me on my journey with Asperger's. Thank-you for always thinking my stories are funny and seeing the good and uniqueness in Joshua;) Thank-you for using your wonderful and talented photography skills to capture our family...that was a skill in and of itself! I'm so glad we are friends:)

"Light it up blue" sometime this month in support of Autism and say a prayer for Max, Joshua and all other children/families affected by Autism:)

A Heart Smile

2011-04-07T12:05:00.000-05:00

Tuesday morning I received a phone call from Joshua's school. His Special Ed teacher wanted me to know that Joshua was having "stomach issues" and I may want to come check him out. Back to Alabaster I drove thinking he would be very excited to check out:) When I walked in the office the secretary checked and said he was in the lunchroom. If I wanted to I could walk down to the lunchroom and get him myself. I put on my visitor's sticker and took off down the hallway. Since I use to be a teacher it really touched me to see all the students with their books talking and having fun. The children seem to love their school so much and to me that is refreshing!

I walked into the lunchroom and found Joshua's teachers. They both came up to me and said, "You have GOT to look over at Joshua." "It is going to make you so happy!" As I searched the large room I finally spotted him...sitting at a table laughing with other boys. Wow!! I truly never thought I would see this EVER! I can't describe how beautiful the moment was. I truly never thought I would see the day that my son would be "conversing" with other boys and LOVING it! When Joshua saw me his face lit up and he ran over to me. "Mom! Why are you here?" I explained his teacher had called me and he was checking out. He was excited! "Bye everyone!" Joshua shouted to all of his classmates. As we were passing, EVERY SINGLE child held up their hands and gave him a high five! That was the moment my heart smiled!

You may ask yourself why a high five would make such an impact on me? Three years ago Joshua told me his life was not worth living. He had no friends, he was "different" and he just didn't understand why God had made him this way. His self esteem was at the lowest point ever in his life. He felt like leaving this Earth would bring him the happiness and friends he so desired. As his Mother I wanted him to see that just because he was "different" didn't mean he didn't matter. God has a purpose for him and his life...a purpose that only HE knows. God does not make junk!!

As I walked through the high fives with Joshua, smiling from ear to ear, I put my arm around him and said "Wow Joshua!" "You have so many friends!" Looking straight ahead Joshua said "I know Mom! I'm the most popular guy in the school!" How sweet is that? God is using Joshua just as he is...Asperger's and all...to touch lives around him. God is SO good to me and I thank him for the heart smile I experienced Tuesday. It is a feeling I hope to never forget!!

Been There...Done That...Didn't Get A T-Shirt

2011-03-22T23:09:00.000-05:00

Today my Grandmother Polly was "officially" diagnosed with tongue cancer. We have known for almost a month that she was doing poorly. She started having severe pains in her face around Christmas time and we all thought it was shingles. We didn't know that the cancer was beginning to form in her small petite frame. Grandmother Polly is 91 years old and has always looked at life with a positive attitude. She has always been what I call a little spit-fire....taking whatever life dealt her.

Last Thanksgiving, me and my sister Joanna had a wonderful visit with her in her little assisted living apartment. We talked a lot about our fun times together. Spend the nights, playing "restaurant" with her unbreakable dishes, walks in the woods, Sunday afternoon lunch after church, beach trips to Panama City and laughter...lots of laughter. Then I started telling her things about my life. Taking care of sick children, cleaning my house, cooking,etc. As she rocked in her rocking chair she would say "been there, done that, didn't get a t-shirt." It made me laugh to myself every time she would repeat it. It made me realize everything she had been through during her life journey. It made me appreciate her even more as a person.

This past weekend I went to visit her in the Nursing Home she now calls home. She slept almost the whole visit but when she would awake she would tell me and Joanna "I love you." It was one of the sweetest things I have ever heard. Her words are now very slurred due to the tumor on her tongue, she is blind and pretty much deaf BUT she still wants to tell how much she loves.....me.

We are not sure how much longer Grandmother Polly will be on this Earth. My prayer is that God will have mercy on her and take her "home" to live with HIM. However, HIS timing is always perfect and I know, in HIS time, she will leave and be reunited with many, many loved ones. On that beautiful day I choose to believe that she will receive something far greater than a t-shirt. She will hear her Lord say "Well done my child...welcome home."

This Is The Stuff...

2011-03-03T13:48:00.005-06:00

I was driving to World Market this morning with Zachary. It is the first time in almost a week that he has been out of the house. This past Monday he was diagnosed with Pneumonia. He woke up around 11 Saturday night crying about a bad dream. When I picked him up it felt like his whole body was on fire! I immediately gave him a dose of Tylenol and took him back to bed. I stayed with him all night and watched him as he reached for things unseen and talked about everything under the sun. His fever was extremely high and was causing him to hallucinate. Joshua and William have never had that high of a fever so this behavior was all new to me. I prayed that God would help him because I knew there was nothing else I could do except be with him and give him medicine. He needed healing from THE Healer.....

Several days went by with a continuous fever of 104 and above until we finally got in with the Doctor on Monday and received one of those painful, but wonderful, shots;) When we got home, as I was holding Zachary again on the couch, I began to think about the past several months. Our home was flooded and because of that our home has been turned upside down. My son Will had been home the week earlier with a stomach bug, Zachary had to have surgery to remove a small ball he had shoved up his nose and now he was sick with Pneumonia. Not to mention watching my Husband every night work so hard on installing our floors...impatience on my part but also frustration that there is not a lot I can do. I know that in every situation there is a lesson to be learned. What was God trying to teach me through all of these incidents?

Today, as I was in the car, God spoke to me through a song on the radio. " This Is The Stuff" by Francesca Battistelli. Here is just a sample of her song:

This is the stuff that gets under my skin
But I've got to trust You know exactly what
You're doing
It might not be what I might choose but this
is the stuff you use
To break me of impatience
Conquer my frustrations
I've got a new appreciation
It's not the end of the world
In the middle of my little mess
I forget how big I'm blessed....

There you have it! God is working on me to get me the way HE wants. They may be "inconveniences" in my eyes but in HIS it's a work in progress! Also, "in the middle of my little mess" HE has blessed me with friends who pray, speak a kind word and bring food to our home:) Thank-you to all from the bottom of my heart. SO good to know that God is watching out for me by giving me such awesome Christian friends:) Love you all!

I Believe.....

2011-02-24T08:28:00.000-06:00

Recently I began a little "assignment" of writing what I believe. I've never sat down and just wrote down my beliefs but I did. I thought I would share them with you...Maybe it will inspire you to think about your own beliefs.

I Believe....

---that God created me and you for a purpose. That HE doesn't make junk.

---in simple acts of kindness to let others know that you care.

---in coffee and the smell it brings to my home every morning.

---in the power of prayer and the hearts and lives that are changed because of it.

---in the Humane Society. That just like people, animals deserve a good home and lots of love.

---in true friendship. The kind that loves you no matter what!

---in love and beautiful flowers on Valentine's Day.

---in the Bible and John 3:16.

---in God's only son Jesus. That HE is the way, the truth and the life.

---in my son Joshua who was diagnosed years ago with Asperger's Syndrome. People may call him "Rain Man" but I call him a gift from God that has changed my life for the better.

---that every baby has the right to live. That God and God alone is the giver and taker of life.

---in warm baths, bedtime stories and butterfly kisses.

---the Proverbial truth, "Train a child in the way he should go, and he will not turn from it."

---in the family unit. The importance of the Dad and Mom working together for the good of the home.

---in laughter and the joy a smile can bring.

---in date night with my son Will. Eating buttered popcorn, drinking soda and wearing 3-D glasses.

---in a quote from Roy Lessin, "Just think, you're here not by chance, but by God's choosing. His hand formed you and made you the person you are. He compares you to no one else---you are one of a kind..."

---in pajama day with my four year old Zachary. Fighting fires and becoming any superhero we want.

A friend asked me one time, "Do you know, that you know, that you know?" Yes, I know these things are what makes up my heart. My heart believes....

Never Say Never.....

2011-02-17T11:20:00.003-06:00

The other day I was thinking about all the MANY times I have said the word "NEVER."
For example...I will NEVER say things to my children that my Mom said to me. I will NEVER have boys... I'm too girly. I will "NEVER" have 3 children! Two is enough! I will NEVER have to work on my weight. I have a great metabolism. I mean the list could go on and on. The truth is that I DO find myself saying things that my Mom said to me. I DID have boys, even though I cannot throw a ball to save my life! I DID have 3 children instead of two. Last but not least, I DO have to work on my weight. Things do change with our bodies with age...including metabolism.

When I was teaching 2nd grade I was in the hall and overheard a conversation in the office. It was our sweet Secretary Mrs. Evans and she was talking to a little boy in Kindergarten. "You stuck a bean in your nose?" "YOU stuck a BEAN in YOUR nose?" Every time she asked her voice got a little louder due to her unbelief. The little boy just sat there shaking his head "yes". I remember thinking, Oh I will NEVER have a child that does that! How gross and weird!

This past Tuesday Zachary was not feeling well. He had a runny nose, bad cough and fever. We went to see our Pediatrician and he began checking everything out. As he got to his nose he looked inside and stopped. He looked at me and said, "Is there a reason why something blue would be in his nose?" Oh my word!! I NEVER thought those words would have been said. Immediately I knew what it was! Cliff bought Will a pellet gun for Christmas with these little blue, green and red balls to shoot. That's where the blue came from. Zachary had shoved a little blue pellet ball in his nose! I was informed by the Dr that we would have to see an ENT to try to remove it. It was too far up his nose!

Off to the ENT we went. The Dr came in, looked at Z's nose and said "let's go ahead and schedule surgery to remove the foreign material." I NEVER thought, as a Mom, that I would be doing this with my little boy. Surgery? Really? SO we set up the day and time and back home we went.

Today at 5:30 AM we awoke to have the ball removed. Zachary was anxious but all went well. I really pray he has learned his lesson and that he NEVER does this again! However "NEVER say NEVER"... right?

A beautiful scripture with the word NEVER is Deuteronomy 31:8 "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will NEVER leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Thank-you God for never leaving me when the NEVERS are happening and for reminding me that NEVER can be a really good thing:)

Did I Say THAT????

2011-02-10T11:03:00.001-06:00

Motherhood has been such an interesting journey for me. Everyday always presents something new and it's truly NEVER boring around my house! My oldest son, Joshua, was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome almost 7 years ago. His Asperger's causes him to totally obsess with things like LEGOS, babies and anything from the 1980's! Josh knows just about every song, who sang it and when it was recorded. He also wants to "look" like he's a kid from the 80's and doesn't like William wanting to "look" like the 2000's! Every time I take him to get his hair trimmed he tells the lady he wants a mullet. I blame a picture of Clint Baker for this one! Josh saw a picture of Clint, in our Senior Homecoming Court, and thought Clint's hair was BEYOND awesome! "Hey Mom, is that guy's hair a mullet?" "Yes Josh it is" I replied. "Can I grow a mullet Mom? It looks so cool!" :/

With all of that being said, here is a list of things I truly NEVER thought I would say....

1. "No I did not know Michael Jackson."

2. "I do not know if Hall and Oates are Christians."

3. "Madonna is NOT the kind of girl you would bring home to Ma Ma."

4. "No matter how much you do not want to hear your teacher you DO NOT mute her!"

5. "This is not 1986. It is 2011!"

6. "Hit the water!!!!"

7. "Stop spitting in the house."

8. "No your feet do not smell like french fries."

9. "I think you just drank mold!"

10."No, do not cut his hair in a mullet style."

I may add to my list as the blog continues but for now these were the top 10 that stood out. Like I said it is NEVER boring in my home and I'm a better person for it. I thank God for providing me with these 3 boys and their precious humor.

Water and a Birthday

2011-02-04T09:07:00.004-06:00

Many of you know that last Monday Cliff and I woke up to standing water in our home. It was 5:30 and none of the boys were awake. I had just prayed to God, while in bed, that this was HIS day and to use me however he wanted to use me. Right after the prayer is when Cliff said, "we have a BIG problem"! That's when he proceeded to go downstairs and get the wet vac:/ I forgot how loud those things are...especially at 5:30 in the morning! At that point the Sons of Thunder awoke and the excitement began. Joshua was yelling frantically because he didn't want the water to hurt his beloved LEGOS, Will was asking a thousand questions (mainly how we were going to eat breakfast) and Zachary was looking for his rain boots! I decided then and there that this was going to be nothing but interesting!

Within several hours State Farm had sent a reconstruction crew to help us get the water out. They were great men and seemed to really know what they were doing. Thank goodness:) By lunch time LOTS of fans had been placed throughout the house, hardwoods removed, carpet removed etc. etc. We were told that the "drying out process" would take at least 7 days! Wow! At first I thought we could live upstairs while everything dried BUT when Joshua arrived from school the thought changed. Since Joshua has sensory issues the fans were extremely overwhelming. The chaos was beginning and I knew we would have to leave our home for a while. Homewood Suites here we come!

The hotel was very nice and I met a lot of people there that were out of their homes too. One family of 5 had been there since November due to a house fire. They had lost everything except the clothes on their back! There was also a little older lady who was staying there because of a house fire and a family who had just relocated and were looking for a home. She had just had a baby! As I looked around I couldn't help but think that God had placed me in that hotel for a reason. HE opened my eyes to the fact that there are people in Hotels that have needs. Honestly, I had never thought of that! Sometimes I wonder if God gets frustrated with me and my unawareness. I mean this Hotel is only a mile from the church I attend. Wow! A lot to think about!

While were in the hotel our Zachary turned 4! It still is hard to believe that four years have passed since we brought him home and the boys asked me about "breath feeding":) A lot of my friends know that Zachary was my last attempt to have a daughter. I just couldn't NOT try for that girl;) Well...God must think that I do well with boys because Zachary Barron arrived on January 26, 2007. He has been a blessing to our family and I cannot imagine my little shadow not being with us. God has given him such an outgoing personality and spirit. I can't wait to see what God does with him in the future!

We are now back in our home after 1 week and although MANY repairs have to be made it is GOOD to be home. I am thankful for this experience and how God has used it to open my eyes even more to the community around me. Now praying HE will give me patience with my husband who wants to do the repair work:/ I truly feel that God has a sense of humor!!

Roller Coasters

2010-08-30T10:53:00.004-05:00

I have never been a fan of roller coasters. I would go on trips to Six Flags, Disney or to a small amusement park and there was one thing I knew....there would be no riding on roller coasters for me:/ Recently, some friends and I were talking about this and I mentioned that I would just sit and wait with my Grandmother Polly for my sister to ride her "crazy thrill seeking" rides. I was just fine...waiting....

Our life with Joshua and Asperger's Syndrome is a roller coaster. I think that's why I often have such a hard time understanding. We can go weeks without a really hard time and then we zoom down into a tailspin with him. That is how the last several days have been. A crazy tailspin! Through tears and frustration Friday night, Josh told me I couldn't survive 10 minutes in his body, I had NO idea what it was like to be him, Why did God have to make him this way? The "whys" were heartbreaking. As his Mother I just know the battle I fought with my body to keep him inside during pregnancy. I know the countless number of trips we made to the Hospital and the huge amounts of medicine I took....just to make sure he survived. The "ride" was long and hard but so worth it to me. Why God can he not see how much he is loved? How much we need him in our family? How much YOU love him?

As the coaster climbs the hill God reminds me that Joshua is wonderfully made. HE knows the number of hairs on his head and HIS plans for Josh are not harmful but they are plans of hope. God reminds me that Josh is a gift to Cliff and I here on Earth to raise up in a Christian home. We have been chosen to parent this child....whatever his needs may be and love him with the love that God has for his own Son. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

I am praying that this week the roller coaster stops and we can all get off and rest a little:) I pray that we find the right "plan" for Josh and that it will be a peaceful journey for all involved. If you are facing similar rides in your life hang on and let God navigate the trip. Pray without ceasing and watch how HE moves:)
Humbly His,
Suzanne

Whew! It's Hot In Texas!!

2010-08-10T10:31:00.003-05:00

Last month we took a trip to Houston, Texas. This is where Cliff's Mother lives and we had not been there in 9 years! We were way past due for a visit! We had originally planed to be a part of a Mission trip with our church to Vail, Arizona. We were going to drive to Houston and spend a few days with Janice and then drive on to Arizona. Of course, this would be a HUGE trip for us with our three boys and as the mission trip drew closer "reality" set in:/ After long discussions we finally decided that Houston would be our own personal mission trip. One where we could share God's love with Cliff's family or whomever we came into contact with on the way.

I wasn't sure how the boys would do driving straight through for eleven hours so we decided to split the trip up and stay in Baton Rouge coming and going. That proved to be the right choice since the hotel we stayed at served "free" dinner AND breakfast! The sons of thunder were thrilled! Stopping also gave Cliff and I time to "regroup" and rest. It was a positive decision.

Before we left I had several women that wanted to pray for us and our trip. The power of prayer is beyond anything I can explain. Cliff and I were SHOCKED at how quiet Joshua was in the backseat of our van. I kept looking in the rear view mirror to make sure he was alive:) To my surprise, he was either watching a movie or listening to his music. Every now and then he would ask about food but that was about all we heard from him. Amazing due to the fact that trips cause Josh to have a lot of anxiety and usually we are trying to calm him down every moment of a trip. Not this time though. He was calm and overall was in a great mood. When I began to question how this could be my prayer partners came to mind. I KNEW they were praying and the results I saw in Josh were solid proof that prayer works! Our LORD says in Philippians 4:6-7 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Absolutely beautiful!!

Overall our Texas trip was wonderful! It was extremely hot but we endured through it. I want to say "thank-you" to Amy, Meredith, Barbara, Lauren and any other sweet friend that prayed for my family while away. Thank you also to Mr. Steve for watching Stanley for us. He was much happier with you than in the kennel:)

I challenge each of you who read this to find a time in your day to pray. You will be amazed at what prayer will do for you and those you lift up to the LORD.

Surrendered,
Suzanne

Let the FUN begin!

2010-06-01T08:49:00.003-05:00

Ahhhhh....the wonderful sounds of Summer break! The Wii is blasting, Stanley is barking, Zachary is running around with his sword hitting whatever or whomever comes in his path.....Yes, Summer is here:) I was just telling a friend last week how anxious I was about having the boys all day every day. What would we do? How would I keep my energy up? Would I survive? Satan was having a lot of fun with me until I put a stop to it. Yes, the evil one knows where to get us. His "stronghold" over me has been anxiety...and lots of it:/ Last week I lifted my strongholds up to the LORD. HE immediately gave me reassurance that I would survive this Summer with my boys. Everything was going to be fine:)

One morning I began my morning devotion with a scripture card my friend Amy had given me. It says, "LORD, the fruit of your spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. Against such things there is no law." Galations 5:22-23 This is exactly what I want to teach my boys and myself this Summer. I talked to the boys about the fruits and then posted them on our fridge. I LOVE having a visual reminder that keeps ALL of our behaviors in check. I so want the boys to learn how to live by God's word and "little things" like this is where it all starts.

My challenge to everyone this Summer is to read this passage and ask the LORD to fill you with HIS Spirit and eclipse your personality with HIS. How can we lose or be defeated it we start every day with this prayer? I thank God today for the opportunity to be home with our boys this Summer. I pray that God will use me each day to share HIS love with them....pirate swords and all:)

A Simple Act of Obedience

2010-04-23T10:04:00.004-05:00

This has been an interesting 2 weeks for me. It's hard to even know where to begin except to just say the Lord is working on my heart. A lot of it is due to the wonderful study by Beth Moore called Breaking Free. Wow! I knew it was going to be good but I had no idea it would be THIS GOOD! Anyway, on my blogs I try to be real. I feel like that is the only way to be. By being "real" I hope that what I say truly means something to those that read my blog. That truly is the reason I write...to put a perspective on things that God would want me to.

As you know, my son Joshua has a high functioning form of Autism. Because of Asperger's he tends to have LOTS of behavioral issues. He is in a wonderful program right now that has been great for him. I am beyond thankful for his teachers and support system. What a calling these women have! Well, last week I received a phone call from the Vice Principal saying that Josh had been suspended for the day due to becoming "physical" with his teacher. Joshua has very little self control but we had not experienced this yet. In my heart I was hoping this would not happen with Josh but it had so it was time to deal. Easy or not. He was very sorry for what he had done. Looking through his teary eyes I knew that he meant it. Very hard for me as his mother to see the pain. We talked about the consequences of his actions and he understood that he could not EVER do something like that again. The rest of the week was great for him. Thank you LORD!

This past week, however, Joshua has had a very hard time. Mainly refusing to do his work. I knew that if he disobeyed more that he would receive a detention and I was supportive of that. Sometimes the only way our children learn is to go through these hard times. On a personal note I had a root canal done and I've had a lot of pain associated with it. As I was waiting in car line yesterday, after the root canal, Josh's support teacher came to get me. Josh was being unruly and they could do nothing with him. SO, here we go....when I walked into the room I saw Joshua under his desk crying. Very upset. I demanded he come out and from there we discussed his day. Through lots of tears he asked me "what is wrong with me Mom? Why do I act this way?" I cannot even put into words how that made me feel. Sorta like knives cutting through your heart....... We got in the car and I told him we would read a book this weekend about Asperger's and hopefully it would help him understand himself more. That seemed to make him feel better.

As I dropped him off at school this morning I was still in a lot of tooth pain. I gave him his reminders to do his best and then he was off. I began praying Jeremiah 29:11 on the way to Walgreens to get my prescriptions filled. This verse is so beautiful and I KNOW that God has wonderful plans for Joshua. I have NO doubt. As I was waiting on my prescriptions to be filled, sitting in my car, a red van pulled up next to me. A very pretty lady motioned for me to roll down my window. When I did she said, "I hope you don't think I'm crazy but something told me I needed to come over and ask you if you were ok. You looked really upset and I just thought I would check on you". WOW!!!! I looked at her and said, "You know, I was just praying for my son. He needs a lot of prayers. Would you pray for him, my tooth AND my very demanding 3 year old?" She looked relieved that she had not been wrong. She went on to tell me that the Holy Spirit had told her to check on me and she was so glad she had. Now she could pray for my family. How awesome is that? A simple act of obedience to the LORD.....changed my day! As I pulled out of Walgreens I called my friend Amy to share with her my experience. I totally couldn't stop crying. It was such an overwhelming feeling to remember that God truly loves his children and IF we will just obey what he wants us to do then lives can be changed. I thank God today for Emily, my little Walgreens Angel, and how she obeyed the LORD today. What an impact she made on my life for simply obeying! May we ALL listen to what God is saying to us individually and put HIS words into ACTION! God bless!

The Sickness...Woo Hoo!

2010-03-18T16:48:00.010-05:00

In mid December William came down with acute Bronchitis and my kids have been sick with something ever since:/ I think it's times like these that really make us stop and reflect. I mean what else can you do when you can't really go anywhere? I have cleaned my house a lot since all of the "sickness" has been going on. Lysol is always my friend and I have the fumes to prove it:) But even while I'm cleaning the questions go through my head. For example, what is going on around here? Why are my kids always sick? Am I being "punished" for something? Do I not take care of my children the way I should? etc, etc, etc......

The truthful answers to all of these questions is germs and allergies just happen. It has nothing to do with me as a Mother. It is something that a lot of people experience...and our situation could be SO much worse. I think it's just after spending hundreds of dollars on co-pays and meds and no time alone that the "craziness" sets in. And I DO mean "crazy". I think I've sang the song Midnight Train To Georgia so often that Joshua now thinks we may be going ...Woo Hoo:)

I did start reading The Shack during this time period at home. I'm very late in reading this but I've really enjoyed it. Just sitting down and reading about Mack's journey with his beliefs has been interesting. It has reminded me that God is always there and HE may reveal himself in many shapes and forms to us. Our eyes and ears just need to be opened. This has been great for me to remember. Especially during these "crazy" times for our family. Even though I may think God is SO far away due to these illnesses it is in fact just the opposite. HE is so in control of my family and being still is just what the great physician has ordered. May I be still and KNOW that HE is God!

The Tongue

2010-02-24T15:51:00.007-06:00

Recently God began working on my tongue. Not a lot of fun:/ I woke up several weeks ago and began reading the book of James and writing notes concerning the tongue and what God says about it. Well....I'll just say it makes a girl think! For me, the tongue has not always been my friend. I can remember growing up and being so "sassy" with my Mom. Bless her heart,during my teen years she endured a lot of ugliness with my words and facial expressions. I so remember like it was yesterday when I was standing in the kitchen with my Mom and I said something very ugly. With a POP from my mother's hand my words were silenced. It was one of the worse feelings that I ever experienced. It was far more humbling than a smack on my bottom. She put it right where it needed to go...across my mouth. My Mom probably doesn't even remember this because she seldom ever disciplined us this way. Most of the time it was punishment by being grounded from the phone. Another nightmare for a girl. The gossiping would actually be stopped for a while. Whew! I am so glad those days are over!

In James 3 the whole chapter talks about the taming of the tongue. In verse 6 the Bible says "The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell." In verse 8 it says " but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison." WOW! Those are words that totally get my attention! It makes me look at myself and what comes out of my mouth. It makes me very aware of what I say to my children. Especially in those moments that are very stressful.

Just the other day Joshua's tongue was used to really inflict pain on me. You see, Joshua has times where he falls apart emotionally. Sometimes it's due to the change in weather, change in routine, allergies...a lot of times it's true frustration. Monday was a great example of this. He had a very bad day at school so he did not complete a lot of his school work. This caused Joshua to have tons of homework. He was already very overwhelmed with the day but I knew we had to get things done. The more I insisted the more upset he got. "Don't you see how horrible it is to be me?" "I hate my life!" "Why did God have to make me this way?" The conversation kept going and I became lost in his words. His tongue became an arrow that shot right through to my Mommy heart. It was a sickening feeling to hear him say those words with tears dripping down his face. This is when the tongue was to me a restless evil...just like in James 3:8.

There are many more parts of the tongue that I may write about later but I wanted to include a chart that is in my Bible about our speech. I hope you find it as enlightening as I did. It reads as follows:

When our speech is motivated by Satan it is full of:
Bitter envy
Selfish ambition
Earthly concerns and desires
Unspiritual thoughts and ideas
Disorder
Evil

When our speech is motivated by God and his wisdom:
Mercy
Love for others
Peace
Consideration for others
Submission
Sincerity, impartiality
Righteousness

I may write more on The Tongue later but until then let's all remember James 1:19-20 "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires."

2010 and Granddaddy Vernon

2010-01-07T13:31:00.010-06:00

It is the New Year...Happy 2010 everyone! It has already proven to be a year of new beginnings. Zachary attended his first day of Mom's Day Out on Tuesday, William lost his two front teeth by being hit in the mouth with a basketball AND it's snowing in Birmingham today! That's a lot of "happenings" already for this 7th day of January. I'm very excited to see what this year holds for our family. We already have made a few plans concerning this Summer and our Life Connection class...I'll explain more of that at a different time. I am also excited for what God reveals to me through HIS word in 2010. In my previous blog I told about my Mom giving me the most beautiful Bible. It truly is one of the prettiest ones I've ever seen. Turquoise with a band of chocolate brown down the middle. The inside is also beautiful, of course, it's God's word. However, my Mom did add a special note on the inside cover and at the end she wrote her favorite verse. Isaiah 43:2. I never knew this was her favorite...shows also that we're never too old to learn something new :-) It took me a while to decide if I would record things in this "new" beautiful Bible but after a deep breath and a highlighter pen I felt it was the right thing to do. I first marked my favorite verse Jeremiah 29:11 and then my Mom's verse. After that I continued to mark scriptures that meant a lot to me or a family member. One of those members was my Granddaddy Vernon. My Granddaddy passed away when I was four years old. I will never forget him or the day he died. You see I may have been very young but God gave me many memories of him. I loved him very much and he loved me and my sister even more. We were the only grandchildren he had and he spoiled us because of it:) One of my all time favorite memories of him was singing in the store where he and my Grandmother Polly worked. He would stand me on the store counter and have me sing "Delta Dawn" for a bottled Coke. Of course I would do it because I've always loved to sing. After the claps ended he would get me down from the counter and walk with me to the old Coke chest. He would slide one of the bottled Cokes out for me and put it in a small paper bag so that my hands would not be cold. It was and still is a precious memory between the two of us:) For a lot of reasons I recently asked my Dad for my Granddaddy Vernon's Bible. I wanted to see what was important to him and his relationship with Christ. It took some time after I received it before I REALLY was able to study it. This is what I found...lots and lots of information on salvation:) Some of the scriptures he had marked were 2 Peter 3, Acts 5:42, Romans 10:9, Matthew 7, Mark 1:15, Mark 11, Luke 11:13, Luke 24:13, John 6:65-66, Acts 1:8, Romans 5, Romans 8:26. Matthew 25:14 and Revelations 22:8-14. After really looking at Granddad's Bible I know that he did not record a lot of things. The scriptures he did record must have been very important in order for him to have made note of them. Also in his Bible are many papers documenting his service as a Deacon in his church. I love how the little girls in the church wrote "To Vernon Campbell...because of your Outstanding service in God's Army. We take great pleasure in awarding you this citation for being a good Deacon." God's Army...Love that! Most of all, through these papers stuck between the pages, I see how much people's salvation meant to him. Sharing God's love and word with those who didn't know HIM. I am so proud and thankful that I had a Granddaddy who desired this for others. I know that this year that is my own desire as well. To share with those who do not know about HIM. In a way I will carry on the love that my Granddaddy also had. It is a special bond between the two of us:) One day I know we will meet again in Heaven and I will see all the lives that Granddaddy touched. I pray that he will also meet the lives that I have and will touch in the future. I know it will be more special than I can even imagine; even more special than our bottled Coke moments. I love you Granddaddy! Thank you for the four years of tremendous love you gave me. Thank you for leaving scriptures that you loved so that I can also study and love them! What an awesome way to start the New Year!

Gifts

2009-12-31T10:07:00.007-06:00

This Christmas has been such a wonderful experience. It is hard to put into words what this year has meant to me. Not necessarily through the receiving of gifts but through the giving of gifts. By "gifts" I mean something a little different. I was totally driven this year to give people the "gift" of God's word. Yes, I have so taken it for granted that my neighbor's have God's word. I mean how can you live in the South and not have a Bible? Well, the sad truth is not everyone has THE book.I found that out through my neighbor Meredith. It really opened my eyes to what I, as a Christian, take for granted. I have always had a Bible. The day I was born I was given a Bible. As I grew my Bible's would grow with me. My Mom always supplied that need for me. This year was no different. My Mom blessed me with the most beautiful Bible. It is actually just like my friend Meredith's Bible...so now we're twins:) I absolutely LOVE it! The NIV Life Application Study Bible. If you do not have one and are looking I strongly recommend this one! The one feature I love the most are the Profile Notes on the people of the Bible. It tells everything you would want to know about each person. Their strengths, weaknesses, key scripture...everything! As I was reading different profiles I came across Sarah. I love Sarah and how God used her at such an old age to bring Isaac into the world. She was intensely loyal to her child which reminded me of my own friend Sarah. Sarah Cook is a sweet friend of mine. She is such a talented photographer and is the one who took beautiful pics of my family. My Bible and pictures were absolutely my favorite gifts this year. I met Sarah years ago when I started a support group at our church for parents of special needs children. Sarah came each week with so much insight to share with our group. I loved hearing everything she knew about Autism...and that girl knows A LOT! Her beautiful son Max is Autistic and she and I have shared the ups and downs of the spectrum. I am always amazed at how Sarah is SO faithful to our Lord and has not let anything, even Autism, get in her way of serving. A true testament of faithfulness. When I look at the amazing shots she took of my boys I am so thankful for her. What a gift God has given her for capturing those perfect, or not so perfect, moments:) Two important things to remember this coming year....not everyone has a Bible and don't let the moments of your children slip by. Share a Bible with someone today and call Sarah if you want gorgeous photos for a lifetime!

Where Is Baby Jesus?

2009-12-13T21:23:00.008-06:00

As a little girl my favorite part of Christmas was playing with our nativity scene. I could not wait for Mom to get it out of the box so that I could arrange the people and animals. I would work on it for a while. Joseph would go here, Mary would go there, and of course baby Jesus was right in the middle. It wasn't a costly nativity but to me it was priceless. The plastic figures seem to come alive with the story of our Savior's birth. When Cliff and I got married I knew that I wanted a nativity set for us. Hopefully one day our children would love it as much as I did. My Mom bought me a beautiful nativity from the Italian maker Fontanini. I loved it! Come to find out I would love it even more when my boys came along. It is not breakable:) Every year at Christmas we get ours out and I set it somewhere special. Just like my Mom did for me. There have been years that were hard simply because the boys played a little too rough with the barn and pieces of the grass roof would fall off. A little messy:/ However, I did wise up and get a different stable that did not have a grassy top. Wal-Mart had many different types to purchase. This year I wondered what Zachary would do with the manger scene. Last year baby Jesus was lost many times and it often frustrated me. I mean what is the manger scene without the baby? I never found the original baby Jesus so I took this little wooden one out of an ornament Joshua had made. He is a small wooden baby with no arms or legs. That was ok though because we just wrapped him up in his white blankie. All was good:) This past week Zachary and I were able to play with the nativity together. It was so funny how he would make the animals talk. He also made the wise men and the shepherd boys have fun dancing around the manger. I laughed when he brought his firemen over to see baby Jesus and I thought it sweet when everyone and everything kissed the baby. As we played we talked about the birth of our Lord and how special he is. Zachary totally understood that part...it was a great time together! If you have never purchased a nativity for your home please do so. I cannot begin to tell you what wonderful moments you will have with your children and this special Christmas piece. At this moment our Angel is missing:/ I am wondering if it's in the same place as the "original baby Jesus". The two do go together:) As long as Jesus is present in my children's hearts that is all that matters. Where is your baby Jesus? If you do not have him receive him now and experience the most wonderful gift of Christmas. "God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son. Anyone who believes in him will not die but will have eternal life." John 3:16. Merry Christmas!

Salvation and Captain D's

2009-12-03T08:16:00.005-06:00

I can't believe I have not blogged in almost 3 weeks! Honestly, my days have been SUPER crazy! Cliff was out of town for almost a week....tried to blog about it but it was too hard putting that week into words. I always wait until I feel God is speaking to me concerning this blog and he was truly not putting anything on my heart to share. I was becoming a little disturbed about it. That is until this past Tuesday....
Joshua and I were in the car on our daily commute to his school in Alabaster. It takes us a good 30 minutes to get there but it has really become a blessing. It has given us lots of great quality time with each other. Joshua really loves listening to his 80's music on his I-POD in the morning too. This morning seemed pretty typical until he removed one of his ear phones. "Mom," Josh said, "I am ready to ask Jesus into my heart." "Really Josh? Well that is awesome!" I said. "Do you want to talk about it when you get home from school today?" I asked. "Yes I do Mom" Joshua replied. Then he put his earphone back in and began singing We Are The World....good ole Joshua style:) I couldn't get over the fact that Joshua was ready for such a wonderful thing! I began praying that God would give us the time in the afternoon to talk. Our afternoons are always a little crazy so I knew prayer was truly needed for some quiet and peace. I also started thinking about Joshua and how far he has come this year. WOW! What a huge difference we have noticed concerning his growth and maturity. The truth is I never thought I would see this day. You see Joshua has always said, since he could speak, that Jesus was in his heart. I absolutely believe that God has special plans for his special needs children. I had already made peace that God had Joshua in his hands...that God had a special place in heaven for him. So, when Joshua made this verbal statement I was amazed. It was truly a gift from God to not only Joshua but to me. HE never fails....I sadly have to remind myself daily of this. As soon as we returned from school that afternoon I began praying. Satan was making the day already hard. William and Zachary were fighting and Cliff had all of a sudden been overwhelmed with work troubles. I wasn't going to let satan win...I put the younger boys at the table and gave them activities to do. I picked up my Bible and headed down to Joshua's room (aka The Dungeon). After Josh welcomed me into his room we both got up on his bed. "I have some scriptures and questions I want to go over with you before we say our prayer" I said. "Alright Mom" Josh replied. We began looking at the scriptures that tell of salvation. We talked about each one and Josh was right on! Once we read through God's word I asked if he was ready to ask Jesus into his heart. Josh said he was....and we prayed. After he opened his eyes I congratulated him with a hug and kiss. "How do you feel Joshua?" "I feel great!" he said. Then God allowed a very "typical Joshua" moment. "Do you think we can have Captain D's as a celebration dinner?" With my boys it's ALWAYS about food:/ "Maybe on the weekend" I said. "Alright Mom... do you think we could sing We Are the World at my birthday party this year?" At first there was a part of me that was concerned. Maybe he didn't "get" what he had just done. Then the Lord told me "it's ok...he's mine...everything is fine". "Sure Josh, we'll sing We Are The World...I love you Joshua and I am so proud of you and your decision". "Thanks Mom, I love you too." That was it:) A very precious moment that will last eternally. I am so thankful that God allowed the time to pass from my last entry. May I never forget that HE is in control. Even of my blogs:)

Laundry and The Drippy Ceiling

2009-11-12T13:57:00.014-06:00

I can remember when I just started Auburn and laundry was now my responsibility. I didn't really mind it that much...usually one load a week was all it took to keep me clean. Then when Cliff and I got married the laundry doubled. However, laundry was Cliff's "thing". He loved doing it and I LOVED him for loving to do it:) We would do a couple of loads a week and that was usually good. I can also remember getting our first washer and dryer as a wedding gift from my Grandparents. We were like beyond excited to place them in our little duplex at Auburn. It was a really big deal to us...no more laundry mats! Now that we have 3 boys in our lives, very messy boys, our poor washing machine is in constant motion. I really can't think of too many days that go by where there isn't a load washing. I have to admit I do get really tired of "The Laundry". It's like it has it's own name around here because it's so much a part of my life. Today I was really trying to catch up on the dirty clothes. I had taken a few days off and it had caught up with me. I decided to run a LOW warm bath for Zachary so he could play with his boats and empty soap dispenser that he had just wasted down the sink. Yes, Zachary is into everything these days! He really likes washing his hands, feet, feet with socks on, toothbrushes, etc. I could go on and on...Anyway, I got him settled in the little bath and I ran downstairs to put some laundry on. Here he came, "Mommy, I want to get in your shower and play fireman". Well, I thought, it is fun and he uses the sprayer part of the shower head to pretend. He likes to spray the shower door and it kinda gives the shower a cleaning..right? "OK" I said, "let's go!" I get him in the shower, turn on the warm water, hand him the sprayer, and close the door. Before I closed the shower door I said, "Remember Zachary do NOT spray with the door open. Keep the shower door closed." "OK Mommy. I will." I ran down stairs again to put more laundry on. Then I heard screams of delight. Since Zachary is my 3rd boy I have come to know what "screams of delight" sound like...not good:/ I ran upstairs and into the bathroom. It was raining in my bathroom!!! Zachary had perched himself on the shower seat and was shooting the water over the door! Everywhere I looked it was wet! Now the choice had to be made. Was I going to go in and face the rainstorm? OR would I let the "fun" continue and let the water overflow out of my bathroom like a river? I chose the first thought...in I went! "Zachary turn off the water! Put that sprayer down!" I said. "I'm going to get you Mommy!" He yelled with LOTS of enthusiasm in his voice:/ I was soaked! I was so wet that I could ring the water out of my ponytail! Luckily, I made it in and turned off the shower, grabbed Zachary (kicking and screaming), and ran out of the bathroom. I closed the door knowing that he could not get back in. Gotta love baby knob locks! As Zachary screamed about wanting more water I assured him that he would not be returning to his firefighter position. He was done! Finished! Fired! As I went down the stairs to fold the laundry that had been washed I noticed a "drip" coming from the ceiling. It was actually coming through the ceiling light:/ Oh my word! I ran and grabbed several pots to put under the drips. Hopefully that would help. I ran back upstairs to the water park. I grabbed tons of towels and began wiping up the water that was on the floor. I made a quick call to Cliff just to make sure nothing was going to fall through the ceiling. He assured me that the water was coming through the cracks. It was ok. Just keep the pans there. Well, thank goodness the leak has stopped. Just another water stain to have to deal with. Ya see, we have several due to our boys pouring water out of the bathtub MANY times:/ Here I go again...more laundry..lots of wet towels to wash...UUGH! It's okay though. How many times did my Mom wash clothes for me in the 22 years I was with her? MANY times! How many times have I messed up things and God has washed my sins away? MANY times! Laundry and drippy ceilings are just reminders to us that dirt and mistakes happen. I am very glad the dirt and mistakes in my life have been washed away and forgiven. May laundry not be a hindrance in my life but a reminder of what Christ does for me everyday:) Bring on the laundry! LOL!!

A Sunday Hike

2009-11-03T14:05:00.005-06:00

This past Sunday we spent most of our time at church. The church we attend is Valleydale Church and we have been members there for about 6 years now. It is really an awesome place with so many people who love the Lord. We are really blessed to have Valleydale as our home church:) After church we came home and really had a nice and pretty calm lunch. Zachary fell asleep on the way home and Joshua was enjoying his room. That made it truly quiet because the boys were unable to fight. Cliff and I decided that after everyone rested (including me) we would go hike at Oak Mountain State Park. The State Park has always been a place where "the boys" enjoy going however today there was a little different response. One was glad (William) and the other didn't want to go (Joshua). Well, after a little "loud talking" we agreed to go hiking as a family and we would take our dog Stanley. Poor dog...he needed to GO somewhere other than our house and the backyard! :/ After Zachary woke up we headed out. Because of the time change Cliff was afraid we wouldn't make it to Oak Mountain before it got dark so I said we should go to this secluded hiking trail over by Cliff's work. That way we could enjoy the fall colors and Stanley would be less likely to see someone and want to bite them! After a little more "loud talking" we agreed that is where we would go. We pulled into the area and no one was there...just us...awesome!! We unloaded and after Cliff investigated a pretty wooded area we chose to hike up this really tall hill. Or as William would say, "a REALLY BIG mountain!" That's when it happened. I was the caboose of our train so I was behind everyone else. Cliff and Stanley were at the top of the hill, then William, Joshua, and Zachary. I luckily had the camera and caught what God showed me. My boys were following their Dad up this huge hill just like they follow him in life. Cliff has a great bond with each of our boys and I am so thankful for that. God could not have given me a better husband or father to our children. When I looked through the lens I prayed that the moment would be caught and it was:) I also prayed that our boys would follow their heavenly father the way they were following their earthly one. No matter how steep the hill (or mountain) gets that they will always stay on the right path with God. It also really spoke to me concerning our responsibility as parents. Our children are only ours for a while. May we all realize how important we are as role models and see that their eyes are upon us at all times. It's a HUGE job we have as parents but it is a challenge that I will accept. "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

Family Dinner Night

2009-10-27T12:38:00.007-05:00

"Can we have a family dinner tonight Mom?" asked Joshua. I thought for a moment...I wasn't sure when Cliff would be home. He usually tries to run before he comes home from work...."We'll see, I'll have to call your dad and see when he'll be home." Joshua went downstairs to his room and I went to the freezer:/ Yes I hate to admit it but I'm a frozen cook. I love to make "homemade meals" but not every night. Tonight looked like a good night for lasagna since that was the only frozen meal in sight. As I am gently opening the lasagna box William bounds up the stairs. "What are we having tonight for dinner Mom?" "Lasagna....yummy CHEESE lasagna" I said. Really hoping the "cheese" part would entice him a little more. Then the screams began...."I hate cheese lasagna! It's yucky!" I want a hot dog with mac and cheese! Of course a little voice was heard besides the big voice saying "me too Mommy". It was starting to already be a stressful family dinner night:/ You are going to lose 2 tokens, William Campbell Tullis, if you keep up this attitude! Isn't there something about using your child's name that just makes your point better? As the screams continued I took a deep breath...."Can we have mashed potatoes with that Mom?" It was Joshua again. He was up from the dungeon (the basement area where his room is) and was intent on being my assistant. I actually did have pre-made mashed potatoes in the fridge. Mashed potatoes and lasagna? Hmmmm....I've never put the two together but at this point anything to keep the peace:) It was going to take a really long 10 minutes to cook the lasagna and thankfully Cliff had just walked through the door. Of course when Cliff comes through the door the yelling really begins as the boys want to wrestle. It's never a very quiet or calm environment in our home no matter what time of day it is. As the little boys wrestle, Joshua is unusually calm. He has draped a towel over his arm and is beginning to speak with an English accent. I think he has heard and seen this from television. I go along with the routine and give Joshua the job of setting the table and filling the glasses with water. As the microwave gives it's final "beep beep beep" we all gather for our family dinner at the table. I am embarrassed to say that I did cave in and make the younger two their hot dogs and macaroni an cheese. Since Joshua knew they were having macaroni he arranged their seats where he wouldn't have to look at it. Joshua can, at the drop of a hat, spit up when he as much as LOOKS at macaroni! VERY sensory with this subject matter:/ I take a deep breath....all of the boys are seated. Our dog Stanley has positioned himself in the perfect area to catch anything that falls. Would someone like to say the blessing? " I would" said Joshua. Alright Joshua go ahead I said. I cannot say everything that Joshua prayed for because I felt like we had our head bowed for a good 10 minutes. All I can say was that it was precious. He thanked God for MANY things but the one thing that stuck out the most was when he thanked God for second chances. WOW! At that moment I looked up at Cliff and I had tears in my eyes. It was so touching how God can use words from a child to bless your heart. He also prayed for the healing of William's hand/arm and that was a miracle in itself since Josh sometimes calls William his arch enemy....that will be another blog. Of course, as soon as the "Amen" was given the yelling continued, William now wanted lasagna, Zachary wanted down and mashed potatoes were being chewed up by a hand puppet. I'm not sure if our family will ever have a "typical family dinner" but I've made peace with that. I'm just thankful that I saw and heard Christ in my child's voice Monday night. I'm not sure anything can beat that! God bless:)

The Fireman, Anxiety and The Orange Cast

2009-10-23T06:53:00.015-05:00

Wednesday seemed like a pretty typical day. Zachary and I were back from our one hour morning commute taking Joshua to school. I was preparing for a visit to my Mitral Valve Prolapse Doctor and Zach would be tagging along with me. As we were hurrying out the door Zach insisted on bringing his backpack, fireman hat and play hatchet:/ Not wanting to have any major meltdowns I agreed and off we went. We arrived at the office a little late but Zachary was loving every minute of it. He had received many compliments from lots of people we had passed. "He is so cute and adorable" was one of many similar quotes used as they looked at this 2 year old fireman. I have to admit he was pretty cute with his hat and equipment:) I was called back pretty quickly to see my Dr....thank goodness! When my Dr came in she broke out into this contagious grin. She could not get over how precious Zachary was. Then the stressful moments began. I'm sure everyone reading this has been in a very similar situation. As I am talking with my Dr about my concerns I feel a "hatchet" being shoved down the back of my shirt. I didn't say anything but I was thinking "Oh no, here it comes"...yes the hat was next. I was trying to be serious, expressing my joys and frustrations, with this crazy heartbeat of mine and I was wearing a fireman's hat! At first I just apologized because I knew how crazy I must have appeared but I had to keep it on. If I removed it, then Zachary would have thrown a terrible fit and my adult conversation would have been over. I think I had the hat on for a good 15 minutes. My Dr did say I would be a pretty fire girl. You know it's bad when you take that as a compliment:/ As I was getting on the elevator with my little fire dude, I thanked God for that moment. Thankful that I had a little buddy to bring with me for "moral support" and thankful that God always keeps me grounded and "real". These are the type of moments that stay in my mind and bring back a smile.

Little did I know that the rest of our day would be even more exciting. Zachary and I had just returned from our two hour afternoon commute to get Joshua from school (yes, three hours in the car every day). Zachary was crying from not getting enough nap time and Joshua was frantically searching the fridge for food. He had, of course, let me know that he had NOT eaten lunch and was "starving"! I was about to walk out the front door to greet William as he got off of the bus when I heard many loud honks. I opened the door and Will's bus was there and his driver, Mr. Andy, was yelling something out the window. All I could hear over the loud bus noises was something about a fall and I need to check him out. Of course my first thought, since he is a "Tullis boy", was that Will was in trouble. However when I saw William's face I knew it was something else. "I fell going to the school bus after school Mommy and my arm hurts really bad". Well, I immediately looked at William's arm. If you know William then you know he's a little on the thick side. Because of his...thickness...it was hard for me to see if there was swelling or not. I brought him inside and got out the ice pack. Of course, even though he was in a lot of pain, he still needed a snack:) After he ate, I gave him some Motrin and then I looked at his arm. Yep, it was swollen indeed! In all of the years that I've been a mommy we have never had a broken bone so I wasn't real sure of what to look for. My instinct told me to call Dr. McCown. I was already having nightmares of having to sit in the ER at Children's Hospital. It was 4:00PM and time was running out. Luckily, Dr. McCown said to come now so that the x-rays could be taken before 5:00PM. Panic mode set in...get your shoes, get your jackets, get....whatever you need...we've GOT TO GO NOW! You would think I would have learned by now that when I get excited so does Joshua. Joshua begins yelling, "Emergency mode, emergency mode...ahhhhhhh!" Yes, at that moment I felt very overwhelmed. I grabbed Zachary, who had no shoes on, my purse and the hurt one. I had to tell Joshua to stop yelling 911 and get in the car. It was truly exhausting. Somewhere in the chaos I called Cliff to let him know we were on our way to the Dr and I might need his help. He was on his way:) I had already given instructions to stay on the WELL side of the room not the SICK side. I didn't want any of the boys to catch swine flu...again:/ (Josh had it a few weeks ago). That just seemed to add fuel to the fire. The anxiety in Joshua rose to a new level. With a shaky voice he replied, "Oh no, we are all going to catch the swine flu! AGAIN!" After many deep breaths I convinced Joshua that he would not catch it (since he's already had it) and as long as he washed his hands good after leaving the office, he wouldn't catch something else.... Besides, we were going to be in and out quickly...hopefully. As we entered the office I went to sign William in. Then I heard the boys begin to fight. Yes, even though William was in a lot of pain he still had the ability to boss Joshua. "You are not a teenager, Mom is Joshua a teenager?". I looked at the nurse and just shook my head. Our Dr has a separate "teen room" and Joshua always goes there to wait. He tells me that he IS a preteen. While I'm explaining to William that it's okay if Joshua sits in the teenager room, although he's not one, the nurse calls us back. Within minutes we are off to have x-rays at a different office (Orthopedic) down the street. The boys grabbed many suckers as we were leaving and at that moment I didn't care how many they took. We got to the other Dr's office without much fuss and had the x-rays taken. Yep, it was confirmed... William has broken his wrist in two places. The Dr put him in a temporary splint and wrapped his hand and arm tightly. While the Dr was giving me instructions more candy was being handed out to the boys. Zachary was leaping off of anything he could find to leap off of and Joshua was asking 50 questions. Total chaos is the only words that truly fit that moment. So, Friday is William's big day (too much swelling for the cast to be put on Thursday). On Friday afternoon, he will get his cast and he has already picked out his color...orange. I'm not sure if that's for Halloween or Auburn. Either way it works out just fine.

These are the moments in my life where my favorite bible verse comes alive. Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I thank God for this experience and I know that it will be one to remember forever:) God bless!

The Tullis 5

2009-10-17T09:16:00.009-05:00

This blog site is going to be a new adventure for me. For years my Mom has said, after hearing one of my "many stories", that I needed to blog. She was, of course, right. I know that my mind has already forgotten a lot of the things that have happened over the years but it's never too late to start :-). I'm going to start with the simple facts. I am in my 30s and I've lived most of my life in Albertville, Alabama until I went to college. It was exciting moving to Auburn and I loved it! After my first year there I met my husband Cliff. We were inseparable from our first meeting. We married almost 2 years to the day that we met. One of the happiest days of my life was when I became Mrs. Clifton Wyatt Tullis. He is, and always will be, my soul mate. We moved to Birmingham after Cliff graduated and have lived here ever since. It's funny because I can remember growing up in my small town and thinking how big and scary Birmingham was. I truly never thought I would live here let alone raise children here. I have to say that Birmingham is a wonderful place full of awesome people. I'm very thankful that God brought us here. After teaching for 6 years I decided to stay home with our newborn son Joshua; my pregnancy was so trying and I was exhausted. Due to preterm labor at 27 weeks I was put on full time bed rest with a Breathine pump to stop the contractions. It was a trying time but I came to rely on God like no other time in my life. I wrote daily in a journal and put my prayers and thoughts into letters for Josh. It was a great way to keep the "worries" out of my mind. When the time came to safely come off of my medication (at 37 weeks) I went into labor and had Joshua. It was a hard delivery and I thought I would never want to have any more children. Of course those ideas quickly, and thankfully, changed. Joshua was so precious and tiny. He weighed 6 lbs 3 oz. A true blessing from above. He was a fussy baby and was very trying at times. Little did I know what the future would hold for him, and us, as a family. Years went by with questions concerning Joshua and his development. He was our first so we felt like we had nothing to compare him to. Cliff and I knew in our hearts that something was not right. Through the years there were many hard times but God put people in our path to help us. One day I was talking to my friend Deena and she mentioned Sensory Integration Dysfunction. I had never heard of this but it sounded just like our Josh. She continued to tell me to find an Occupational Therapist and they could help with the diagnosis. At 4 years of age, and after the birth of my 2nd son William, we found our OT at Children's Hospital. We met with Amy Elmore and she confirmed that Josh was truly SI but there were also other things going on. Autism was a word that had been mentioned to us many times but it scared me. I didn't see Josh as being Autistic. I thought to be Autistic meant you had to constantly be rocking and banging your head on the floor or wall. It was a world that I would soon come to know....Joshua received his diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome at the age of 5. When our Neurologist gave us this diagnosis I had very mixed emotions. Happy that I had the diagnosis, relief that I wasn't crazy but sadness that "my" dreams for Joshua would now be quite different. Now the goal was to understand Asperger's. Would Joshua be a lot like the Dustin Hoffman character in Rain Man? Right after our diagnosis we were shopping at a local store and Joshua was reciting facts about one of his favorite obsessions which was Star Wars. The sales clerk said, "Well you have your very own rain man". She had no idea what we were going through and I just had to smile on the outside while crying on the inside. It's amazing how differently you see the world and the people in it when you have a special needs child. I'm often amazed and saddened by the lack of care in our society for other people's feelings...but that will be another blog:). Joshua is 10 now and wow have we had LOTS of experiences! Good and bad...I like to remember the funny moments but will always cherish the learning ones too...there have been many of those! My William is 7 and we added another little Tullis boy (what else?) in January of 2007. Zachary has lit up all of our lives and the bond that he has with Joshua is very special. I cannot imagine our days without him. So this is our family. The Tullis 5! We are a family who is anything but "typical" and I praise God for that! I hope you enjoy my future blogs where I plan to share our many experiences with life. Thank-you for stopping by and I hope you return soon & often! God bless:)